Crunchgate – The Blame Game

So after seeing Jason Calacanis getting thrown under a bus by you dopes I am forced once again to stop doing important puppet arts work on the Cashmore puppet to address some issues.

I knew it was Divvyshot a long time ago. Many people did.

Jason Calacanis was not my source. If you search I never wrote a thing saying it was divvyshot.

No emails from Jason were in any way involved in the making of this story. Nothing was spoken about, reprinted, or transmitted by me in any way.

What did happen was that Sam Odio confessed due to the pressure of the situation.

Crunchgate - What Makes Sammy Run?

Well it seems we have yet more about Crunchgate to discuss. I thought we were all done with this. It really is the gift that keeps giving. It seems our newest character in this pathetic tale is some guy named Sam Odio. Seems Sam owns Divvyshot. Sam’s also an idiot, see he’s the guy who Dainel Brusivlosky wanted the McAir from for reviews on Techcrunch. He says he never got it for him though. Good for you Sam. HIS FRIEND DID GET DANIEL AN IMAC though for coverage. Right Sam? Anyway, Sam wrote a big woe is me blog post about how I outed his crimes with Jason Calacanis. Only problem is it never happened. A lot of people knew that Sam was dirty and weak. Many people know of his story with Daniel Bru. I had 3 different people tell me in fact. Amateurs like these guys tend to have big mouths. Especially dopey ones with shitty iphone apps.

Knowing how weak and stupid someone must be to be in this situation to begin with I knew I could scare this guy into confessing his evil ways. I tweeted. “You have 24hrs.” That’s it. That’s all I said. Well, when you are guilty and stupid that’s all it takes to make you cave, because that’s exactly what Sam did. Sam, you are a weak dishonest dope. You were played by Daniel Bru, and now you were just played by your own guilt.

All I needed to do was give the mere suggestion that Sam might get caught and he confessed, and that’s what happened here. Social engineering FTW!! Sam you need to stop crying. You are weak, dishonest and stupid. I can’t imagine these traits help you with building quality iphone apps.

The real story Sammy boy is not you, but which one of your friends BOUGHT DANIEL BRUSIVLOVSKY AN IMAC FOR COVERAGE ON TECHCRUNCH?

C’mon Sammy the truth will set you free. WHO BOUGHT DANIEL BRUSIVLOVSKY AN IMAC FOR COVERAGE ON TECHCRUNCH?

The CrunchGate 100 - A Puppet Speaks

Well boys and girls all good things must come to an end and now its time for this this good thing to end. Don’t be sad though it’s not the end of Techcrunch saying and doing stupid things. I promise you that that will always continue. Maybe.

I also wanted to settle a nasty rumor. It seems many of you may feel that my CrunchGate investigation is in some way revenge for Mikey screwing me over at The Audience Conference. Let me assure you that this has nothing to do with it. Watch this video, do I seem mad to you? I knew that Mike would screw me over, that’s his thing. The conference was a huge success and the next one is already planned for Caroline’s comedy club Aug 14th. in NYC. You can buy tickets here in fact. No, the reason I got so pissed is because I know some good people that Mike has hurt with his strong arm tactics, among “other things”. A lot of you already know what I’m talking about. I wanted to let people know that Techcrunch is nothing more than a guys website. No different than your own really, except you probably have a lot more integrity. It’s ok to poke at, and question Techcrunch, because it’s all bullshit. As demonstrated by his cowardice in this whole affair Mike Arrington has no juice that you need to fear, just ask JooJoo, the guy who laughed in Mike’s face, as he said so perfectly “Ummm Techcrunch is just a blog.” Who do you think is going to win that lawsuit? Companies, PR people, whomever, you guys need to see things for what they are. Techcrunch is a vanity blog of a bored ex-attorney with poor social skills. That’s literally all it is, anyone can go through SEC filings for these moronic companies they “cover”. What is hard to do is act like such a pompous douchebag that someone would actually spit in your face. When your best friends are Loic, Scoble, and Gillmor you know you have a problem.

If Mike Arrington had any dignity or class at all he would step down. If he really cared about Techcrunch or it’s employees he would step down. Techcrunch is nearly worthless as a media property at this point due to Mike’s behaviors. No big media company is buying Techcrunch. Cashmore or Denton might for chuckles, but don’t look for Rupert Murdoch to be singing Arrington’s praises the way he does say a real journo like Kara Swisher. Mike should step down let Erick and the boys handle things and try and salvage whats left. Outside of that dirty prick Brusivlosky and a few other morons, the team at Techcrunch are good people.

When the going gets tough Mike runs away to Hawaii or Tahoe or his parent’s house. I think it’s time Mike runs away again, for a long time. I hope he does and he thinks about what a dope he is. I hope the dope realizes that time is running out on him and that if he wants to matter again he’ll need to finally grow up and start to act like a normal decent human being. I also hope the tech genius doesn’t give away the GPS coordinates of where he’s hiding like he usually does.

This was never about me, or a conference, or a personal grudge. It’s about all of us. If we are to matter as people or even as a medium we need to do the right thing, and treat each other with respect. We need to inspire and help each other. That’s how we will achieve a “true” community, and push the medium to its full potential. I sincerely hope Mike can get past his own ego and insecurities and can finally reach his potential as a person. It will be mediocre at best I’m sure, but hey it’s better than another CrunchGate.

Since dopey doesn’t have the balls or common sense to do it himself, the puppet presents the CrunchGate 100. I’m done with this nonsense.

The CrunchGate 100

Time for another internet story. Today’s topic is paranoid delusional bloggers and the short attention spans of their readers.
more…

Techcrunch Has The Audacity To Want More Interns

Techcrunch needs an intern. It’s insane that these dopes have the audacity to look for an intern. What kid in their right fucking minds would want to intern at techcrunch? What sane parent would let them? Look at how well it’s worked out for Daniel Brusilovsky. Maybe not the best example considering this guy is filthy dirty and corrupt already. Although I guess if you are interested in strong arming people who are smarter than you, and actually trying to do something, this would be the place for you.

In my opinion, Techcrunch is not a good, safe, productive environment for any kid looking to do good in the world. Period.

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