This Is What You Are Missing

In an effort to be transparent I’d like to honestly say my teasers are better than most other peoples entire websites and entire “creative” output. If you think you are going to get a funnier Steve Ballmer puppet, you know what? Take that deal because there is no way on gods green earth you are going to find a better Steve Ballmer puppet if you are into that. Meaning Ballmer or puppets.

This is what I do. Why? No idea. Why do you like it? No idea. What I do know though is that we are both probably a little fucked up that we find this funny, but we do. This is a 30 second clip of the last Ballmer video. He says Bing a lot. I wanted to post it to give the doubters who say I’m not A-List anymore. People who say my puppet hand is somehow not strong anymore. Oh yeah? Yeah. You talking to me? I must be talking to you cause I don’t see nobody else. Except you and that Ballmer puppet. Anyway, the point is we like this stupid shit. I like making it and it’s time for this brother to start gettin’ paid. So like any good slinger Imma give you a taste of the good shit baby. The grade A+ motherfuckin’ shit. The Ballm baby. Imma give you 30 seconds of the Ballm baby and you’ll be back for more baby, back for more. So you best subscribe before you come back here all tremblin’ and shit wantin’ mo’. You gonna come back here and say “I want some more of dat Ballm. You got mo’ dat Ballm?” And Imma gonna say to you “Did I tell you to subscribe? Course I got more dat motherfuckin’ Ballm, you best be subscribed though.”

$5.00 a month buys you all da Ballm you want baby.


Twitter Destroys Intellectual Value

Let’s talk twitter for a second, and how it actually devalues you, and your precious content everyone is so concerned about getting in realtime.

Twitter has around 25 million active users.

Now we know that everyone loves twitter and is on it a lot, but for discussions sake let’s say the average user spends 2 minutes a day on twitter or 1 hour a month.

25 million users a month x 1hr. month = 300 million hours a year.

We are very concerned about this data. We create it, we want it in realtime, for it to be secure all that stuff, but we can’t download it though. There is obviously a value to this data as demonstrated by our concerns for it and twitters protection and sales of it which brings us to the next part of the equation.

What is an hour of your time and writings worth?

Now let’s forget for a second that you are a highly compensated social media expert who’s time and wisdom is worth at least $300hr. Let’s just say you are a regular blogger or work in a Starbucks and you only make $10hr. We’ll use that number.

$10hr. x 300 million user hours for a year = $3 BILLION DOLLARS in brain power and time.

So based on very conservative data the collective intellectual value of twitter as generated by it’s users is $3 Billion dollars per year.

Twitter recently announced that it did deals with Bing and Google for $25 million dollars for your tweets.

That means twitter just sold your work, and their data for pennies on the dollar. Twitter just shaved $2,975,000,000 off the value of the collective work of their community.

So here’s the final value of your time and work according to twitter.

$0.08 per hour.

$25MM ÷ 300MM user hours = $0.0833333333 per user per hour.

So now that google and MS have the data for $0.08 per user they will be able to see first hand that twitter does not have nearly the activity or users everyone thinks they have, they will see all the bots and a few users who generate most of the nonsense. They will see that they overpaid even at $0.8 cents per user.

So do you still think your precious tweets and realtime news data from morons is valuable? Because no one else does. Especially bing, google and twitter.

Bing Bing Bing iphone Ringtone

The first of the 1938 Media iphone ringtone collection.

Bing. Bing. Bing.

Download for iphone