I dunno Yue, when I’m talking to an attractive woman it’s hard enough for me to speak English. I’ll have to stick with the first one.

Hello!

By jvon on Mar 5, 2007

I’m surprised to hear that in NYC people would address you in an ‘Asian language’ just because you ‘look Asian’. Sounds quite offensive to me. I guess these people also try ‘African’ languages on black people *cough*

By Stephan Tual on Mar 5, 2007

Don’t be silly. Everyone knows they communicate by playing drums.

By jvon on Mar 5, 2007

Yeah, I know what Yue means. You’d be surprised how many ’straight’ guys make moves on a gay guy with a nice ass like me.

They’re such doofuses. If it was me, “I’d say, “Nice ass, dude.”

But no, they always say some stoopid shit like: “That’s a fine lighter you have there.”

Where’s the common sense?

By Vince Williams on Mar 5, 2007

Hmm, that’s totally something I’d say. Not to a guy, mind you.

By jvon on Mar 5, 2007

Wait - my swearing in Cantonese isn’t the way to go. Damn.

What works on you, Yue? That’s what your watchers want to know.

Being Jewish, well, that just gives me that added advantage.

By Jeremy Pepper on Mar 5, 2007

Jeremy,

I think Yue made it clear that she likes the direct, no-bullshit approach. What could be smoother than a simple, friendly “Hello”?

I’ve had sex with only one Chinese woman. She screamed my name at her climax and scared everybody at the wedding party.

Does group sex count? One time somebody dosed me with a bootleg Quaalude, and the next thing I remember is waking in someone’s beach house, in a bed with several naked people of both sexes, none of whom I knew.

I’m pretty sure there was a Chinese guy in there. At least they were all good-looking.

I remembered nothing of what had happened (damn the luck, that would have been a lifetime’s worth of fantasies).

By Vince Williams on Mar 6, 2007

I don’t have a computer, so I’m using Vince’s.

Vince is a shameless liar. That chick was Japanese, not Chinese.

I’ve known this character a long time–most of what he says is true, but he changes the details. Take anything he says with a grain of salt.

By Boz Goya on Mar 6, 2007

Fuck you, Boz. Just for that you’re sleeping in the v-berth tonight.

By Vince Williams on Mar 6, 2007

“She screamed my name at her climax and scared everybody at the wedding party.”

That’s probably the best thing I’ll read all day.

By jvon on Mar 6, 2007

The Jews and the Chinese have a special connection Loren. You should know that.

Thanks Vince. I wasn’t really listening, I have the computer on mute so I just watch her mouth move. It’s more office-conducive.

By Jeremy Pepper on Mar 6, 2007

hahaha
“Since when has being Jewish ever been an advantage? Unless of course when it comes to ordering Chinese food?”
thats the best thing i’ve read all day

By Broc on Mar 7, 2007

We celebrate Xmas together, Loren. You know that.

By Jeremy Pepper on Mar 7, 2007

lol. “Wo shi ga da sai gua?” Funny. What’s even more amusing is that I get the whole “Konichiwa” phrase a lot. Do a friggin look Japanese? sheesh.

By darkmoon on Mar 14, 2007

I have yellow fever. Not because I love Asian culture. Not because I’m some anime freak that likes dragons and fireworks. But because I’m bored of white (in particular American) girls. I have this inner desire to embrace new people, ideas and traditions. In my search of Boa Kwon on youtube (I’m learning Japanese in the fall — going to Univ of Hawaii) I found you on someone’s page as a favorite. You are absolutely hilarious, Yue. You made me an instant fan and all my college friends will hear about you and this site shortly! Please do not lose your sharp tongue. The world needs people like you, especially now!

By William on Apr 15, 2007